First loop dissolved father wounds — women noticed immediately, unapologetic desire returned.

First loop in the morning. The first thoughts were that it is okay to be fully masculine — mighty and healthy. I had always feared really being masculine due to my father's way of being. I feel very good and stable afterward. The moment I left my home, magic happened. Fear was gone, nervousness non-existent, and a stability that I had to push myself to step into — so I did it anyway. An ever-present feeling of I am enough, no need to show anything to anybody, just enjoy this in stillness but full of power. It was so different that people got out of my way and women subconsciously showed interest in me. In the evening at the river I attended a zoom meeting on lack of father figures and masculine power. I was calm, able to experience every pain there with a sense of: I rise above everything that pains me. I let the wound come forward and started a healing technique. Twenty minutes later I felt love flowing under the ugly wound and starting to heal. I saw a woman I liked and for the first time I wanted to desire her unapologetically. I rose out of my childlike avoidance patterns that day.